The Votes Are In! (kind of)

Democracy: A government of the people, by the people and for the people. That is, those people who actually take the time to participate. Look, they’re certain things we take for granted that one can overlook. There’s the fact that we have moderately clean air to breathe. Water that comes from a pipe every single time you want it to. Food that is available for consumption without the threat of disease, contamination or root beer (seriously, how anyone can like that shit is beyond me). We wake up every morning and have it the best of anyone else on this planet. Or perhaps in this universe. We really don’t know how those fucks from Ork are doing now that their only visitor Mork took the leather belt challenge a bit too far and is now running around with Mindy in that Denver apartment in the sky. Too soon? Too nanoo nanoo? So you’d imagine my surprise when one gets an actual opportunity to participate in ensuring that we get to keep and maintain our comfortable lifestyle that he/she completely and fucking ignorantly throws that opportunity in the proverbial garbage bin. Look, I don’t want to get off on a rant here but holy hanging chad Batman! I get it, you saw a George Carlin bit from 1981 and now you think it’s cool not to vote. Well played, Carlin. But before you enjoy that 99 cent burger or that airbag-having vehicle, take a minute to think where all that shit came from. Laws were passed. Representatives were elected to ensure we have clean water and max-strength condoms. Sorry, that was the name of my last band – Clean Water. I know, I know, the system sucks. Hell, the system may be fucking broken. But it sure as fuck ain’t beyond repair. And ANY change that you hear the abstainers bitch and moan about has to come from the grassroots level. Local politics. We need a third party system in the national electorate like I need a beer – very badly. But we cannot expect to gain any momentum on that front without participation. And that participation must start with a better turnout than 42%. That’s the number of eligible voters that turned out in November 2014 in California. (I’m not even going to mention the turnout for our most recent local municipal elections. It’s embarrassing.) And that’s not counting the adults who are eligible but don’t seem to care enough to actually register. So keep complaining, keep crying your eyes out because your taxes are too high. Yes we know, Obama is taking away your guns and Trump will build a wall to keep his sanity intact. As long as your Frosty is nice and smooth and roach-free, you don’t give enough of a shit to do something about it. But unfortunately for you, it’s those types of people that keep your cool dessert nice and bug-free. Think about that next time you pass the polls, middle-fingering democracy whilst getting your dogma from dead comedians. But hey, people voted for Tricky Dick so maybe I’m way off on this whole “everyone should vote” thing. But I digress…