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Uncle Ben's Blog

Summa-Summa Summertime!

3/12/2015

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School's out and there's sort of a buzz, but back then we didn't really know what it was... Late in the day and I ain't been on the court yet, hustle to the mall to get me a short set... Yep, That's right folks, it's almost summer time! I know, I know, it's not even spring. Why am I writing about summertime? Because I saw Independence Day last night and I miss Scientology-free Will Smith, that's why. I don't want to get off on a rant here but I'm pretty sure summer may be the best fucking time of the year. That's right. I said it. I'm looking at you Christmastime! You want a shot at the title, autumn? Keep walking, springtime! How can anyone not like summer? If you're a kid, you've just barely passed whatever grade you will look back on as the peak of your life and are looking forward to relaxing by the pool and doing absolutely shite all summer. If you're an adult, you've just gotten used to the time change and are looking forward to quitting your job and relaxing by the pool and doing absolutely shite all summer. Who the fuck likes winter when all the chicks are wearing 37 1/2 layers of clothes to keep their pale, no-tan-havin' asses warm. Now, flash-forward to summertime and imagine the sundresses silhouetting in the distance and nothing but bronze beauties showing off their coconut flavored skin. Whoa. Almost went down a rabbit hole there. So anyway, take your cold ass weather, your Christmas cheer, your Punxsutawney Phil and put them in the attic for good. I'll take board shorts, a poolside beer and bikini side-boob any day. But then again it's going to be 130 fucking degrees this summer and I love getting Christmas presents so maybe winter ain't so bad. But I digress...
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  • In The Beginning
  • Bios
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  • Uncle Ben's Blog
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