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Uncle Ben's Blog

Referees? Refer-please!

1/6/2015

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Those who can’t do, teach. Those who can’t teach, coach. Those who can’t do shit, become NFL referees. Holy pick up your dirty, yellow laundry Batman. I’m not saying all NFL officials are complete shite but… you know what, all NFL officials are complete shite. In fact, all officials, referees, umpires everywhere are fucking clueless, blind shitbirds who can only get on the field by making sure everyone else plays by their rules. I don’t want to get off on a rant here but me thinks it’s time to go full fucking iRobot. I think some A.I., Johnny-5 motherfucker can make better calls than these senior citizens. I’m tired of trying to watch any and all sport live or in person and having to deal with these fucking whistleblowers stop the clock to watch an instant replay of a call that 99.9% of the mouth-breathers that have their steady-date’s football jersey on can make in their sleep. You know what the rest of the fucking public calls whistleblowers? Tattle-tales. We get it, we need someone to make sure little miss quarterback doesn’t hurt his weggy-poo. But that doesn’t mean I have to endure a holding call that happened 40 yards away from the play negate the game-winning score. Great job zebras, you got your moment of fame. You’re doing a great job umpires, everyone is watching you now. You know in the history of live sporting events, I don’t think anyone has ever bought a ticket to watch the officials make a call - correct or incorrect. You know what, I take that back. I’m sure their mommies have come to cheer on Ricky Referee as he tries to be as invisible as possible. But then again, where would sports be without these incredibly important facets of the game? Maybe they aren’t as bad as I think. But I digress…

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  • In The Beginning
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