Kan(ye)-Artist

And the Grammy goes to.... wait, aww shit, here comes Kanye again. Oh, he's joking? That's actually kind of hilarious. Oh wait, he's serious? That dude is an asshole. Look, I actually like Kanye's music. Some of it. I think he should be praised for being honest/sociopathic in a very plastic, dishonest world. But come the fuck on. I don't want to get off on a rant here but someone needs to fix that little fuck's underbite with a boot to the chin. You don't think Beck deserved the Grammy? Fine. Opinions are free and no one should spite you for having one. But stop with the fucking spotlight show. We get it, you have a permanent space underneath the well-sculpted ass of Beyonce. You apparently have this urge to help out the poor girl because the multi-millionaire has no resources herself. Ever wonder why Jay-Z has no fucking time for this midget? It's because he feels about as threatened by Yeezy towards Beyonce as I do by a 7-11 hot dog. I've never met one I can't handle. There's a reason why Shorty McLeatherskirt has never done this at the Source Awards. Or has never done this to Zakk Wylde or anyone who weighs more than a sack of Russet potatoes. I'm not saying calling out Beck and T. Swift is chicken shit but I saw more weight in bacon-wrapped smokies eaten at Super Bowmania than the 2 of them weigh together soaking wet. So take your wife and her ass implants, your kid SouthBySouthEast and just stick to making semi-tolerable music. Or maybe he's right and a genius and I am doing exactly what he wants. Either way, I'm entertained. But I digress...